A dog, Metallica, and a run

>> Monday, January 17, 2011

I have been walking Marley since she came to live with us. Before that I wasn't doing much of anything. Marley doesn't love going to the backyard by herself and I worry about her getting enough exercise because she lays around much of the day. Oh the life of a dog. Saturday Matt only worked half a day and after I got Ruby down for her nap I grabbed the yellow dog and went for our normal 3 mile walk. We got to the top of our hill and Metallica came on my iPod.

Gimme fuel, gimme fire
Gimme that which I desire

I began to run. The song was blasting in my ears urging me on. It felt good. The cold air burned my chest but I kept going. I felt so alive. More alive than I have in months. I felt strong. And then I started crying. And crying. I can only imagine what the people that passed us in their cars were thinking. It was not the "I feel sorry for myself" cry that I have been doing but it was me crying over our loss. It felt different and so hard to explain. It was a cry that I will probably do many more times. I am so far from healed inside but I want to say thank you for all the wonderful comments, emails, and phone calls from my breakdown last week. Each one of them meant the world to me and made me know that I am not alone like I feel so often.

I wouldn't have been out there had it not been for the yellow dog. Can Marley be helping this mama heal? Maybe this big girl came into my life at this time for a reason. She got me to get out and do what I love again. She is by my side even when my babies blow me off to go and play in another room. I don't know the answer but I am sure glad that she is here with me.

The above shot was taken on Sunday. Marley does not wear that pack when we go out but I brought my little camera with me in case I saw something I wanted to take a picture of so we threw it on her. I did find something that I wanted to take a picture of - Marley. Do you know how hard it is to run and take a picture at the same time?


Cara Monday, January 17, 2011  

I love that you were running while taking the shot, great job! I think you might be on to something with Marley coming into your life when you really need her. Animals are amazing for the soul.

missy Monday, January 17, 2011  

oh you teared me up! :)

And great shot - while running!

Pam Monday, January 17, 2011  

Haha! It's VERY hard to take a picture and run. I do it all the time.

Rachael Monday, January 17, 2011  

Yellow dogs are wonderful running companions, and are even better at helping you heal :-)

Liz Mays Monday, January 17, 2011  

Bless your little Marley for being there just when you needed it!

Buckeroomama Monday, January 17, 2011  

I was just going to say that that's an amazing shot considering that you're running while you took that shot! :)

Joey Lynn Resciniti Tuesday, January 18, 2011  

To run and take a picture is tough, to run, take a picture and not fall down? That would be just about impossible for me!

My favorite part of having a dog is that she makes me go outside every day and get fresh air. It does wonders for the mood. Of course, I don't always feel happy about it at the time, but I know it's a good thing.

Shelly at Aperture of My Eye Tuesday, January 18, 2011  

Good for you...getting back to something you loved doing. I'm glad Marley is helping you heal. :)

Anonymous Tuesday, January 18, 2011  

So much a part of life is just putting one foot in front of the other. Your picture is the perfect graphic for our journeys through the highs and lows of our days. You are always in our hearts. Becky

Anonymous Tuesday, January 18, 2011  

Your picture is the perfect graphic for the way we put one foot in front of the other as we move through the highs and lows of our days. You are always in our hearts. Becky

Kimberly Wednesday, January 19, 2011  

The title of your post sounds like the kind of novel I'd pick up to read. I'm glad you're back at what you love, and I'm glad Marley is in your life now.!

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I am 45 years old and married to my best friend Matthew. We are the parents of 3 girls, 2 dogs, and a cat. This is the story of us, try to stay awake.


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